Hello, everyone.

I am sharing a story I wrote a while back with my old writing group. We had a prompt, and it was to write a letter of fiction or create a story around kitchen appliances. I wrote a short story to it, and I recently started working on it again.  This is humorous, and with the way the world is these days, I hope you enjoy it.

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My name is Alicia Miller, and I am writing this apology letter to you as a neighbor who is at war with the family next door.

I tell you ever since that family moved in next door I told my husband, William, that they would be trouble. It all began when my husband insisted we make nice with the Robinson Family. This was when the beginning of my nightmare began. You see, I am 60 years of age, and both my William and I are retired. I tell you when I think about all the things those darn children did to my beautiful appliances. I can’t bear it. 

Sadly, I came to realize very early I could not take care of children. This is why I was glad when I met William; he shared the same sentiment.

Do not get me wrong!  I have nieces and nephews, but I know when they visit, they will not stay. Well, as I was saying. Who places a squash into a toaster? Yuck! I can’t fathom it!

Then my amazing blender that William gave me for one of my birthdays, which was used for mixing our different juices in the morning. Who places rocks into it? Those children did! Oh, but when I think about my expensive microwave and the fact that the fire department had to come because they placed forks inside of it. It makes me cringe! 

Now you are probably asking for whom this letter is for. It is an apology letter to my kitchen appliances, and I am sending this letter and letting it circle around our neighborhood as a symbol of how ashamed I am that I let those barbarians ruin them! 

 I will also work towards the betterment of the mistreatment of protecting them in the future. 

Just one last thing. I will be out of commission for about six months as my husband William has just informed me I will be institutionalized for a while. I guess they got worried when I carried my half-broken spatula and tried to nurse it back to health.

Sincerely,

Alicia Miller  (Currently deemed insane)