Failure: A 6-Month Check-In
This is my 6-month check-in for an article I wrote back in January, about the problem with perfection and why to take chances.
You can read that article here.
The premise of the article was the fear of failure, and how I decided that I was going to push myself to take chances and not let that fear hold me back. In fact, my goal was to fail as much as possible for the foreseeable future.
Life has been exciting since January. I honestly thought this article was going to be a list of things I’ve failed at these past months, but I think the only thing I’ve actually failed at is writing this article when I actually hit six months. I have been mentally preparing to spill all of my faults out for you all to read, but when I stopped to think of all of the things I “failed” at since the beginning of the year, nothing actually comes to mind.
What? I’m shocked. But it’s the truth, because each step I’ve taken since January has moved me in some sort of direction—whether it was forward, backward, or to the left or right. I haven’t stayed in the same exact place. And I think that, in itself, is progress.
I started off the year with a job that wasn’t in my dream career field, where I couldn’t utilize my writing strengths to the fullest; now I’m a copywriter who writes and edits every day (and I not only get paid for it, I love it!). I was also still struggling with my anxiety and my down days back in January; now my anxiety is only situational and my down days are few and far between (although, I’m still working on my mental health, which will be an ongoing process). I don’t panic about the future as much anymore because I know that each step I make in the “now” will get me somewhere. Where…I’m not entirely sure. But that’s the beauty of it all.
I originally set out to fail and expected that everything I went for was going to turn into a disaster. What I should have done was step forward into the unknown future with a little more faith in myself and a lot less fear. I used to be as afraid of failing as I am of death, but failing is a learning experience every single time it happens. When I physically trip and fall and end up on the ground, I don’t just sit there. I pick myself back up, probably laughing at how clumsy I am. It happens, and I shouldn’t punish myself for misstepping literally or figuratively. And neither should you.
So, as I continue into the unknown, putting one foot in front of the other, I hope that you’re all right there with me—telling fear to “fuck off” and living life in the best way possible: without holding back. I hope you take chances, I hope you “fail,” and I hope you have faith in yourself to keep going, no matter where your path leads you.