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Poetry
Home›Poetry›Hidden Strength

Hidden Strength

By Alena Orrison
July 23, 2018
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“Tiny warrior” by janssen_bremen is licensed under CC BY-NC 3.0
“Tiny warrior” by janssen_bremen is licensed under CC BY-NC 3.0

I am not as strong as you state

Gaiety is a mask I wear

Oh, I am secure with who I am

I know my path and nature

Yet I have to be there for everyone else

So who do I turn to?

 

I am not as tough as you think

In the dark of night, I weep

Muffling my sobs with my pillow 

Red-rimmed eyes in the morning

Are the only sign of sorrow

Makeup conceals more than blemishes

 

I am not as durable as you presume

I do not have it all together

I am scattered and broken and lost

Holidays are the most dreaded

Watching other people’s cheer

 

I am not as sturdy as you wish

I avoid contact with the world

Not wishing to share my longing

Or to destroy their happiness

With my melancholy experience

 

I am not as stoic as you imagine

Grief bears down on me

It drags at my heart and soul

I refuse to let it win or control me

For I am in charge of my course

I can pretend to be strong

 

Someday I will be strong and tough, 

as you state, think, and presume

I will be durable, sturdy, and stoic 

As you wish and as you imagine

Healing will happen in time

 

But it would be nice, sometimes

To have a shoulder to cry on

To be held and consoled

Will no one give me comfort?

I guess after all, despite what I think

I am as strong as you state


Image Credit: “Tiny warrior” by janssen_bremen is licensed under CC BY-NC 3.0

TagsPoempoetrygriefStrength
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Alena Orrison

I am a freelance writer and editor. Yup, I like to read, write, and edit! I hold a Bachelor's Degree in English, with an emphasis in Creative Writing. I started writing stories when I was three years old; well, I told them and my mom wrote them down. I have been editing professionally since 2015. I currently live in North Idaho with my husband, four children, two grandchildren, my mom, three dogs, four cats, and a varying number of chickens. When I am not at the gym, hiking, gardening, or spending time with family and friends, I am reading and writing. I also like to crochet for some downtime. Some of my favorite authors include Ann McCaffrey, Elizabeth Cunningham, Elizabeth Gilbert, and Erin Morgenstern.

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