Miracles After Infertility
Since I was a teenager, doctors have told me I would be unable to get pregnant due to numerous health issues. At that time, I did not really understand the impact that would have on me as an adult. In fact, it was not until I got married and my husband and I decided we wanted to have children that the reality of the situation set in. After only a few months of being married, we were referred to a fertility clinic to address the medical issues that were preventing me from becoming pregnant.
My house quickly became a place where I would give myself injections daily, take numerous types of pills, and feelings of disappointment, which quickly overwhelmed me as I saw negative pregnancy tests time and time again. Family and friends who were unaware of my inability to get pregnant would constantly ask when we were going to have children. My siblings began having children of their own and were scared to tell me when they were pregnant for fear of hurting my feelings. I became jealous of them being able to do what I could not, though I kept that jealousy to myself.
Every procedure and surgery were difficult and, at times, made me question if fertility treatment was even worth it. I pushed forward with treatment and continued even when I was sick or in pain. I missed many important events because treatment had to come first. Any time we would take a step forward in our treatment plan, something would set us back.
Finally, in October, I was able to move forward once again and do an embryo transfer through in vitro fertilization treatment. I only had two healthy embryos frozen, so using one created a lot of anxiety for if the procedure failed in getting me pregnant. On Halloween, I was shocked by the news that my hard work had paid off. I was finally pregnant. I brought the news to my husband, who was also shocked. It was hard to take in. We were excited but also unsure of what was to come. What would happen if I had a miscarriage? What was the likelihood, knowing my medical issues? I continued taking injections and other medications that would decrease the likelihood of me having a miscarriage. It was an incredible relief to be able to discontinue these medications, though it was also scary in a way.
Now, I have had multiple ultrasounds and I sit here at thirteen weeks pregnant, feeling my baby boy kick. Genetic testing not only provided us with the gender of our embryos before my transfer, but also helped us know that everything was safe genetically with them. While I continue to worry often about things that can go wrong, I am also grateful to know that a great team of medical professionals has brought us this far in our journey, and that with the help of science, I achieved something that I had always been told was impossible.
For anyone who is going through the journey of infertility, I urge you to keep going. Keep your head up and when you feel like giving up, don’t. It is such a difficult process, and at times, it is overwhelmingly disappointing. But your doctors will do everything they can to help you achieve your goal of being pregnant, so just keep going. Miracles do happen. I know because I am carrying my own personal miracle inside of my belly right now. Believe in yourself, seek support from others going through similar situations, and in the words of Dory from the movie Finding Nemo, “Just keep swimming.”