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Home›Memories›The Predatory Friendship

The Predatory Friendship

By Sarah Dowell
April 22, 2019
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Predatory Behavior, Manipulation, Toxic Friendship
Photo Courtesy of David Clode via Unsplash

You were the one that kept me broken. The desire to play the hero must have taken over you. Every time we were together, it was you that kept making sure I was feeling down. Nothing I did or said was good enough unless I was upset. There was no interest in anything unless I was feeling bad about myself.

You cared when it was convenient for you. It never mattered as long as alcohol touched your lips. Once it did, the world was always about you. I asked about you regularly. Once the friendship came to an end, I tried to fight for it. It was never worth fighting. It took too long before the realization kicked in. Your cruelty was overwhelming, but it was hard to see.

Claiming that I didn’t want to be “fixed” because “broken” gave me attention – is that how you plan to justify what you’ve done? Broken does not describe me. Pull out your mirror, see yourself for the witch you are. You use your “broken” past to get ahead in the world, but you aren’t ahead now, are you? You’re stagnant. There is no advancement in your life. Getting rid of me was supposed to make your life more complete.

I was weak when you ended the friendship. It was intentional – I know that. You waited until I was at my lowest. Claiming to be born of an angel and demon, you might not realize your demon side was the strongest of them all.
I see your ghost in my memories, and when I look back, you never were what you portrayed. You were a monster, sucking the life out of everyone around you. If you didn’t get your way, you ran away. Accusing me of being the broken one is comical now. It took so long before I could laugh at our past. I called you “sister.” You saw the means to an end.

Look in the rearview mirror of your life. There will be nothing but lost friendships, trainwrecks of relationships. You don’t care, do you? You’ve wrecked a family. You’ve destroyed several homes to get what you want.

You wanted to be a therapist. I supported your dreams for a while. I will never again say you would be great at your desired career. Perhaps you should stay in the dead-end career you’ve made for yourself. You are not a healer. Choosing to harm those around you, leaving out of boredom – no therapist would do that.

They require patience, love, compassion, all the things that you fake. How terrible it is living your life as a shell. You don’t know what love is. How dare you? How dare you come into the lives of others and wreck them? Carnage is all you know.

Your narcissism is going to be your end. When the friendship came to an end, I was happy. It was as if I lifted a weight from my chest. I fought, wanting to be in your life. It was to know you were okay. It was to know you were going to survive on your own. All you did was abuse others. Using people to your advantage is a shame. They will see through you one day.

When the world sees through you, what will you do? Will you abandon them as you did me? Or will you run away again, start fresh in yet another location. Someone once drove you a long distance, merely to get rid of you. It should have been a sign when I heard that story. Instead, I felt sympathy. There was a desire to help you, put you back together.

It was never worth my time. So much time wasted on such a monster is sickening. You make me sick. I have never meant those words as much as I do now. You make me sick. The thought of you disgusts me after knowing what you are. Stumbling across your information, to see your social media, it’s disturbing. I want to warn others about you. Your manipulation would overpower any warning though.

It took me long enough to see the danger. The hurt in your eyes once seen was nothing more than seeing what you were. Ignoring it was a difficult task. Hearing the warnings about you felt nonsensical. I wanted to help. Having a friendship with you seemed worthwhile. It never was. You chose to waste my time.

Live with your own decisions. Do not remember me as I no longer want to remember you.

The only memory I want of you is one in which I notice your havoc. All you have done is cause pain and damage everywhere you go. It’s impossible to believe you never meant to. You chose to hurt others. You befriended others to reach your ultimate goal. After your destruction, do you feel it was worth it? Do you think about the damage you’ve caused? I know you do. You make jokes. Blaming the other party does not make you a better person.

At that moment, your betrayal was painful. Your deception hurt. I came out stronger. I was never the broken one. I don’t wish ill upon you. I know one day you’ll see what you are. When you see it, I hope you scream. Improve yourself for the sake of others. You claim to love others. There is no love lost after everything.

I wish you the best. The best thing for you is to realize you’re a monster. You were never the victim. You were the predator.

TagsbetrayalfriendshipstoxicToxic FriendshipVictimPredatorLiesReliefDisasterpainmanipulation
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Sarah Dowell

Just a girl from the midwest with a lifelong passion for writing.

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1 comment

  1. LB 6 August, 2020 at 04:47 Reply

    PERFECT.

    Thank you.

    Monsters are real…we call them “people”.

    Take Good Care Sarah.

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