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Health & WellnessParenting & FamilySelf-Help & Relationships
Home›Nonfiction›Health & Wellness›Toxic People And How To Handle Them

Toxic People And How To Handle Them

By Heather Lauren
April 29, 2019
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Warning: The contagious agent of toxicity is spreading. Avoid this agent at all cost. It’s sneaky, manipulative and if you allow it, it has the power to overtake you.

It is my wholehearted belief that toxic people should come with warning labels. I had a recent encounter with a person who displays these poisonous personality traits. What are the personality traits? Toxic personalities carry some common traits — passive aggression, manipulation, criticism, and negativity to name a few.

Even without warning labels, it is fortunate they are easy to identify. Their attitudes and their negative opinions can distinguish toxic personalities. In my experience, they don’t even know they are venomous. By nature, they self-identify as having “strong” personalities. This infers others have weak personalities. They require accommodations for their self-appointed strength.

In truth, a toxic person leaves people around them feeling drained.

As an extrovert, I strive around people and look forward to the fellowship. Yet this interaction left me uncomfortable and drained. I’ve worked in customer service roles for years, and I think fast on my feet. To the contrary, this encounter was displeasing, and it threw me off my game. I dislike to be thrown off my game. So, I prepared strategies to deal with poisonous people.

Strategy 1

Runaway: Avoid the person if it’s not someone you have to deal with. Your time is precious, and it won’t be returned. Don’t give toxic people your time.

Strategy 2

Boundaries: If this person is not easy to avoid, give yourself a time limit on all conversations. Include another person in the conversation. This person can serve as a physical barrier. Many people behave better with others. Setting up mental barriers is an effective way to block someone’s ability to affect you.

Strategy 3

Prep Work: If you can’t avoid this person, prepare for them. Think of past conversations and ways to defuse the situations. Stay cordial, never give them an argument they crave.

Strategy 4

Recognition: Acknowledge who they are and take back your power. Eleanor Roosevelt said, “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” Do not allow anyone to drain you or make you feel self-doubt. Recognize the type of person they are and remember how strong you are.

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Heather Lauren

Heather resides in the heart of North Carolina with her husband, 3 kids and 2 Labradors. When she is not meeting the tireless demands of motherhood, she works full time as a Financial Counselor while completing her Bachelor's in English & Creative Writing. After receiving a degree in Business Administration, she realized she would rather be poked in the eye-repeatedly than take another business class. Currently she can be found revising her first novel and working on her second. Heather is a tea snob and urban fantasy book junkie. When not writing she can be found sipping copious amounts of tea and watching reruns of Gilmore Girls, Grey's Anatomy, Supernatural and Charmed.

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