Trigger warning: Therapy, depression, loss

I have zero focus most of the time. The best way to get me to do something is to pay me or be my friend. Once I get started I will finish something. It may take me a while, but I will finish it. This week I have an assignment from my counselor to figure out why I admire my creativity. Every day I  read some of my writing from a few years ago. It has been wonderful because I can see my progress over the years.

Writing has always been a way for me to escape and cope with my life. My first set of characters that live in my head rent-free was my answer to feeling like my friends didn’t want to hang out with me. 

It occurred to me later that my friends just didn’t know how to help me when we would hang out. The more independent I am, the more I can do with my friends. Independence has become incredibly important in my life in the past few years, and my main current goal is to get back as much of it as I can. Logan and James, two of my main characters, helped me navigate many nights alone until I broke out of my shell. Romance is one of my favorite genres to write because I love the story of how people find their matches. I haven’t found mine yet, but until I do, my book boyfriends are enough. Stories have the power to look at something from the outside. 

Authors have the privilege of being able to write about their internal struggles and help others through their stories. Sarah J Maas is probably my favorite contemporary author right now. She tackles themes like depression, loss, and acceptance so that even if you hate a character at the beginning of a series, you will realize people are complex. One of my best friends showed me her books, and I am thrilled that they did because they helped me realize the type of author I want to become. The only person that can ruin your focus is you—time to get back on track.