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Home›Relationships›The Subtle And Mysterious Art Of Shutting Up

The Subtle And Mysterious Art Of Shutting Up

By Heather Lauren
May 13, 2019
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Man shhing camera
Photo courtesy of Muhd Asyraaf on Unsplash

The subtle and mysterious art of shutting up is often overlooked. People have a tendency to share, myself included. We like to share in our joys and pains, but we also want confirmation and acceptance. It is because of this acceptance we often give people more power than they should be granted.

Recently I was presented with multiple career options. I received some empowering advice from a trusted advisor. In contrast to the empowering advice, I spoke to someone else and received some contrary opinions.

Which lead me to ask myself: why in the world did I tell this person anything?

We grant people the power of approving of our lives.

Regardless of the situation, we’ve all been hurt by words. We have all experienced how deep words cut. We build up defenses and strengthen ourselves in response. Yet as a species we talk entirely too much.

We share our world through social media; we post pictures hoping for likes or views. We grant people the power of approving of our lives.

There are times in everybody’s lives when we wish we kept our thoughts and opinions to ourselves. Everyone has said something they regret. We’ve hurt someone with our words, and sometimes relationships have ended because of the things we’ve said.

To have our words thrown back in our face is debilitating. The art of foot removal from our orifices is common practice. We learn from these moments and grow to understand that sometimes it’s best to keep quiet.

Become quiet and embrace the subtle and mysterious art of shutting up. Never allow someone to steal your happiness by oversharing. Share with the right people, not people who will tell you whatever you want to hear. Find someone who adds value to your life, not lessens it or complicate it.

The older I get the quieter I become. I am a natural sharer. I share words with the world biweekly hoping my speculations may help someone overcome hurdles. Become a quiet observer so when someone asks for your opinion you can enrich them.

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Heather Lauren

Heather resides in the heart of North Carolina with her husband, 3 kids and 2 Labradors. When she is not meeting the tireless demands of motherhood, she works full time as a Financial Counselor while completing her Bachelor's in English & Creative Writing. After receiving a degree in Business Administration, she realized she would rather be poked in the eye-repeatedly than take another business class. Currently she can be found revising her first novel and working on her second. Heather is a tea snob and urban fantasy book junkie. When not writing she can be found sipping copious amounts of tea and watching reruns of Gilmore Girls, Grey's Anatomy, Supernatural and Charmed.

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