Carve A Little Joy
The past few months have been rough for me. I’ve had to deal with my confidence being crushed by someone important to me. My whole life, I’ve worried that I’m a burden to everyone I know. My family and friends have done everything they possibly can to assure me that they are glad I exist. However, every time I can’t fill up my dog’s food bowl or help clean the kitchen because my chair is too big, I feel like I should go away. I wouldn’t hurt myself or anything; I just think about checking myself into a group home so they can take care of me. I work through these feelings by working out so that I can get stronger. I’m lucky enough that my disability is not so severe that if I am in good shape and have the right environment, I am mostly independent.
The last few months, I have not taken the time to set aside time to work out. I have made excuses like “I’m too tired today” or “one day won’t kill me.” The problem is one day can turn into two months. You notice a difference when something positive in your routine gets thrown off. It isn’t always something as physical as losing muscle. You may be quick to snap at others. You could find that your thoughts tend to be more negative. You may have less energy. I know it can be hard to carve out time when I’ve had a tough day. I know I have to tell myself it’s okay to let myself go to bed. It’s okay to recharge sometimes.
It’s important to learn activities that help you become the best person you can be every day. It doesn’t necessarily have to be anything physical. You could read a book or make a snack. I know life can get in the way, but it’s most important to be the happiest and healthiest you. We can’t always control our jobs or things that happen to us. We can, however, try to give ourselves the best advantage by keeping ourselves happy.
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